#filtered

How stupid I was to envy you, when I had no clue what you were going through.

Shame on me for wanting your life when it was only those squares 'suggesting' you survive.

How could I only see your new bag glitter as you shone less. Glow gone heart bitter.

Ladies, S T O P I T. Love Y O U R life. Every last drop. Your worst is her wish and your wish is her worst. Snap out of the illusion. The grass ain't greener…She's just using a better filter!✨✨

Happy Saturday my loves..as always … V 😘

Sisterhood

As Nina put it 22 years of making too much noise in public places! ❤️

What I love so much about friendships is that it is a choice. Unlike family where you just arrive into a unit and are now subject to culture, religion, cooking style, passed down opinions and thinking. Friendships are the connecting of souls on a multitude of levels, relying not on the DNA coursing through your veins but on the simple measure of likability and uniting on levels that there are just not enough words to describe. Friends that bring out the best in you, can connect with you as you stumble awkwardly through puberty, likewise be there as you navigate motherhood for the first time, likewise be there and still liking, loving and connecting with you as you battle through every storm causing you to harden and change. Those people who rock and roll with you through all that and more are a G I F T. I repeat a G I F T. ✨


I look at this photo and see mothers, wives, business women, housewives, a teacher, a manager, divorcees, one of us with no kids, one with 1 kid, one with 2, one with 3 and 1 with 4! You see big boobs, no boobs, big hair, no hair, you see west Indian, west African and English heritage. You see those who've cried over miscarriages, those who never thought they'd become mothers, those who left abusive relationships. You see feet that have travelled the four corners of the earth you see mouths that have shared secrets, cried for help and laughed till bellies ached. You see survivors. You see warriors. You see banter. You see love. You see life lines. You see SISTERS.

I have 4 biological sisters and feel so blessed by the many friends that can also wear that title. A friend isn't just someone who you speak with everyday. I particularly love the ones where 1 year passes and you begin the phone conversation with a squeal and a comfy spot on the sofa… what's time and distance for true friendships.

Celebrate your squad today. ❤️

As always… V 😘

I’ll see you queening on the other side.

This is NOT my current situation and neither do I 'feel' how I did in this photo. Sometimes life really ambushes you and instead of feeling like you have it all together you feel as though you haven't even started yet. Then you think about it over and over and realise that it's not LIFE… it's YOU. It's you who has become your worst enemy, critic and oppressor. It's you who has decided to forget every achievement you've ever made. It's you who has decided that your default setting is -1 and now the dial is stuck….

And its in the moment of self sabotage I begin to write, I write to you I write to me, the me of yesterday and the me of tomorrow. Each paragraph loosens the tension, slows the heart rate and clears the fog. .

Even the self love preachers need a sermon of their own medicine sometimes. Even the so called 'super mum's' (if that's even a thing 😒) need their capes dry cleaned from time to time.

The woman that is bold, brash and beautiful is me. The woman who is sometimes sad, silent and submerged is also me, it's also you. Make no apologies. Find your way out as mine is to write and we'll see each other Queening on the other side. Crown straight. Mind straight. 👑✨. .
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As always … V 😘

Justice for Rash

I'm so sick of this. I'm crying because I have a BLACK SON. One 20year old pursued by police officers cannot just be arrested and interviewed and afforded the rights of any other human being. NO I forgot our boys are brutes, inhuman, savages. Not worthy of dignity. Not worthy of life.

When they arrest child murderers and sexual abusers the vilest criminals of them all, they somehow survive to take that mug shot. Not our boys.

To the mama of Rash, my darling. You carried him and birthed him. Raised him for 2 decades and now in a senseless act of police brutality he is GONE. No more hugs, no more teasing him about girlfriends no more hope for his future. Please be strong as we all stand with you.

I don't care if he had a drugs on him, in him. I don't care if he was a thief or a robber. HE SHOULD BE ALIVE.

The courts should have decided his fate. NOT a murderer masquerading in a police uniform.

#edit…
In the days since I wrote this article I have got into debate about the circumstances surrounding the death of Rashan Charles. If I'm honest these debates have somewhat incensed me because I have found myself having to defend a dead black man who's voice can no longer defend himself.

I truly don't believe that there is a race outside of the black race where sympathy and empathy for losing a life is dismissed of in favour of…"well he must have been a criminal"… "well if he wasn't up to no good he'd be alive". Excuse me? So if that's the case we wouldn't need the judicial system or prisons to house these vermin who seem in popular opinion better off dead.

The issue here with Mr. Charles is NOT about what he had done or was in the process of doing the issue is that a police officer on duty decided that excessive force was required to restrain/ attempt to arrest. To the point we are not talking about a broken shoulder or nose but we are praying that he will rest in peace.

My issue is that if you are a black man who dies at the hands of the police we have to begin digging and uprooting your past to see if it warrants our cries for justice to be served on your behalf. I don't buy that. Yes karma is a female cow and I like most people would rather criminals be off the streets rather than cavorting around freely destroying our communities but isn't that why we have judge and jury? Isn't that why we have forensics, evidence and testimony. You see my issue is and I will say it again only once is that Rashan Charles, 20 years old, murdered on Saturday 22nd August 2017 was not afforded the luxury of even getting his wrists cuffed, instead an autopsy is about to be performed as his family decide what he should wear in his coffin.

RIP RASH ❤️ Rashan Charles

We Are…

We are the women that don’t make the headlines or red carpets but yet WE make the world go round.

We are gym regulars lifting ‘man size’ weights, we are women standing in the House of Commons heading up debates. We are the same women rushing home to wash the dirty plates.

We are women injecting hormones to conceive that child. We are the women telling husbands to keep away cos today we’re fertile.

We are in the workplace fighting sexism. We are marching in the streets holding placards high with our message- Feminism.

We are Black Lives Matter mothers, wives and daughters preaching. We are confused, self hating destroying our melanin by bleaching.

We are the mixed couples trending, we are the step families blending. We are the happy homes pretending.

We are Mary, Martha and that woman found in proverbs 31. We are women hustling for that diamond hoping to God, that THIS man will be the one.

Oh we women are everything and a bag of chips and yet STILL look in the mirror and our beauty, form and heroism we diss.

Oh We Are….. As always V 😘